Loneliness can knock on anyone’s door at anytime to steal their happiness. But everything depends on you and how to cope with it.
In this article, I would like to highlight and explain some of the types of loneliness people face in their lives. I would additionally explain a little further to help you understand them and know how to deal with loneliness. Before I begin let’s know the meaning of loneliness:
It is the state of being unhappy as a result of living without the companionship of others.
Honestly, everyone has faced loneliness in life before and it is not pleasant at all. In this article, for you to know how to deal with loneliness, in general, you must have a positive mindset.
Loneliness is the human condition. Cultivate it. The way it tunnels into you allows your soul room to grow. Never expect to outgrow loneliness. Never hope to find people who will understand you, someone to fill that space. An intelligent, sensitive person is the exception, a very great exception. If you expect to find people who will understand you, you will grow murderous with disappointment. The best you’ll ever do is to understand yourself, know what it is that you want, and not let the cattle stand in your way.”
― Janet Fitch, White Oleander
Strategies On How To Deal With Loneliness
The mind has always been the greatest weapon of man, when used well it can help you conquer any kind of loneliness you face. Loneliness could set in anyone’s life, it could be the result of death anxiety, marriage divorce, lack of friends and so forth.
The very minutes, hours, days or months you feel lonely is very crucial, if you don’t take care you will do something silly and regret afterward. Instead of doing anything silly you can use those moments wisely by doing something profitable like learning new things in life.
You can learn how to sing your favorite songs by getting the lyrics beside you, learn how to play guitar, how to cook a particular food, learn how to dance, etc. It is a matter of using that time period to develop your talent or enjoy your hobbies.
For example, I easily kill my boredom with music and movies. It could keep me busy the day if I have nothing to do. I also prefer speaking my mind through this very blog site and others. I feel too occupied to allow loneliness to steal my happiness.
If you have a wife or husband you can talk to him or her about interesting topics. Just make good use of the very moment you will be feeling lonely. To help you know how to deal with the loneliness I will talk about dealing with this awkward feeling:
1. at night
2. in a marriage
3. after a divorce
4. in a single life as a Christian
Starting from the first one which is How To Deal With Loneliness At Night
Having positive thoughts before bed heals you from all anxieties. You would wake up refreshed in the morning. The night is a moment in which every kind of work and other activities end or calms down, paving way for resting time. The night is meant for sleeping, so after a hard day work you can relax on your bed till sleep takes over you but in a situation whereby you feel lonely in a sleepless night, you first have to find the reason you feel lonely.
If it is general loneliness but not none of the reasons I listed above then you would need to keep yourself occupied by developing a strong mindset of wading away that uninvited loneliness in the night. I recommend you to listen to any kind of music you like because music is a special kind of food to the brain.
It also has the healing power to cut stress. You can make use of any of your favorite hobbies, it could be reading, painting, drawing, chatting online, etc. If you have anything like movies, you can watch, even if it is old movies watch them and as you watch, that feeling of loneliness will go away, you will feel sleepy and your mind that has been active during the night making you have uncomfortable loneliness will become dull and let you sleep.
But please, the moment your eyelids become heavy switch off your TV set and any electrical appliance and sleep. You will wake up afresh in the morning to go ahead with your daily routines.
How To Deal With Loneliness In A Marriage
Marriage is the companionship of two couple so why would you even feel lonely?. Is there a problem misunderstanding and so you don’t talk to each other?.
If only you haven’t divorced then there is no need to feel lonely. Maybe your partner has traveled and you feel lonely.
Well, in this case, it wouldn’t be a good idea to commit adultery, control your self and wait till your partner returns. Whenever loneliness sets in, you can call her or him on the phone, talk for hours and all these hours your mind would be filled with happiness making you forget about your loneliness.
Communication is very vital in marriage so if you are distant away from each other one good and lovely communication can drive away that loneliness away. Right after the call your mind would become sweetened and make you contemplate all the good words or topics you talked about and that could last in your memory till your partner returns.
When you have frequent communication it becomes a sign that you are in a safe environment. In a case where you stay together in the same house, there is no good reason for you to feel lonely if there is something you don’t like about your partner pinpoint it and together solve it amicably. Mutual understanding can solve all problems and sometimes you can compromise to make sure peace, love, and happiness to exist between you.
Dealing With It After A Divorce
For anyone who wants to know how to deal with loneliness after a divorce, the first thing you have to do is to see a marriage counselor can help you deal effectively with any challenges you will face after the marriage divorce.
Divorce is likely to affect one couple much than the other partner because divorce normally begins when one partner feels fed up or finds out something unpleasant he or she doesn’t like.
In terms of cheating the one who felt cheated can file for divorce and that step would certainly hurt the unfaithful lover very much. In the short run, everyone would feel a negative effect. The immediate effect would be emotional pains followed by loneliness. If you are a Christian pray to have comfort from the Lord, tell him exactly how you want him to help you, trust him and he will answer your prayers.
The Dealing With It As A Christian
The bible has all the answers a single Christian would need to get rid of loneliness. The bible says, leave the marriage bed undefiled meaning stay away from fornication.
If you are searching for your partner pray over it and allow God make the perfect choice for you. He instituted marriage in the Garden of Eden and so he knows what is best for you, do not move ahead of God but let God move ahead of you by telling him that you need a potential and God-fearing partner and believe me he will do it, no matter how long it will take. Just know that God’s time is the best.
God sees through everyone’s hearts and minds so he knows who deserves your love and who doesn’t. Your finite mind can’t see through the future and the minds of people so leave everything to him. Stay away from bad friends because they can influence you to sin against God.
The devil always use carnal minded people to execute his plans. He is full of lies and deceit. Listen to gospel songs that will uplift your life in God anytime you feel lonely.
Share the bible verses and stories you read with your friends through the internet, SMS, call your friends to share the word. Find a place where you will have your Quite time, visit friends in their houses occasionally to talk about important life matters and all these hours or moments will set your mind off the loneliness you are going through. You can read Christian blogs or motivational blogs like this one online to keep you busy from feeling lonely.
When you go to church you can join youth groups and other Christian groups to extend the boundaries of your friendship.
Socialize to meet new friends in your church, work-place or even in the house, but make sure you choose good friends. I don’t advise to trust human beings because they are not perfect. Trust in God always for when he becomes your rock you will never fall down. Amen.